You Cannot Read DOTA 2’s Latest Patch Notes

DOTA 2 Does the Funny

If WordPress had a wingdings font option, you can bet I’d use it here. But for now, I’ll have to set aside my desire for “show don’t tell” and just speak plainly about what’s going on. It’s very simple, really: DOTA 2 released its patch notes in 👹 👺 🤡 💩 👻 💀 ☠️ 👽.

No, really. They just went and did that. And there’s lore, too! Enjoy this plaintext, ’cause this is all it’s giving you.

Hey, everyone.” The post intros, “I don’t have much time. I snuck into Valve and managed to grab the complete patch notes for 7.34, and I’m posting them for everyone to read. But I think something went wrong with my copy-paste, because it’s all in emoticons. Anyway, so long as you can read emoji, you should be okay.
Surely this error will only be a mild inconvenience and not require ARG levels of effort to solve.
Dota 2 Co-op Campaign
Lucky for us, though, a translation has already been created. DOTA fans immediately got to work cracking the code. And they’ve posted their results here.
Contrary to what you may expect, fans are actually super happy about this change of pace. The collective puzzle-solving was a fun little adventure.

People raging about this post on Twitter should come to reddit and see how much fun this is,” one user wrote. “Great job, Valve.

I don’t know who’s writing these hilarious blog posts at Valve, but they’re amazing,” said another.

Seems like a recent development, probably some new person writing these.” One person speculated. “The 7.33 notes were also pretty funny.