Nintendo Confirms Toad Isn’t Wearing A Hat

Horrendous Mushroom Top is Part of His Head After All

A recent video from Nintendo confirms Toad and his entire species aren’t wearing matching hats. Instead, that’s just his head? No, I’m not insane for caring about this. Once you accept that all Toads are sporting such enormous noggins, many other questions are raised.

Nintendo Confirms that's not his hat

The answer in question was provided during a Super Mario Odyssey video Nintendo posted yesterday. According to Mr. Koizumi, “Maybe there’s something inside” that colossal spotted dome. What, though? Brains? A hot mess of cartilage? One of the key ingredients in a healthy dinner? If it’s just mushroom and not like, brains, then what does that say about the rest of Toad’s anatomy? Where does the fungus end and the sentient life form begin? If Toads are just mushrooms with conscious thought, how are they born? Does Princess Peach’s castle have a huge, damp basement where these things are grown? Is the outfit grown with the rest of them? I’m probably going to be up all night thinking about this. Thanks, Nintendo.

If you’re curious, there are other questions that Koizumi answers over the course of the video. He touches on the subject of Mario’s nipples, though not in a definitive fashion or anything. If you have a hard time accepting this distressing revelation as truth, Dorkly was kind enough to go into much more detail on the subject last November. Happy hunting!