5) Sonic the Hedgehog (November 8)
Remember directly above when I talked about nostalgia? Well, look what’s coming to theatres 20 years after it stopped being relevant! Why anyone thinks now is the time to strike with a feature-length Sonic is beyond me and you know kids are not going to be lining up for this. Unless parents want to drag their kids to see a movie that should have come in the 90’s, this one is going to crash financially as well as being a stinker as well.
Trailer also forthcoming here.
4) New Mutants (August 2)
He-Man seems to be a template for the rest of this list as New Mutants once again has all the ear markers of disaster. After a STUNNING trailer debut last year, New Mutants fell on some tough times and got pushed back nearly a year for what were described as massive reshoots. Since then, there really hasn’t been, well, anything said about this one and it slides into August 2nd with no competition. No why? Cause August is the summer dumping ground where studios hope the bored teens of the world will just go watch whatever comes out. Considering this was marketed as a horror film as well, that August release date is looking even more sketchy. I smell a disaster on its way…
3) Men in Black International (June 14)
What the hell is this?!?
2) Alita: Battle Angel (February 13)
Ah yes, the movie that was on the list last year as well. Allow me to delve back into how to spot a bust before it actually comes out. Last year, Alita: Battle Angel had a cozy June release date in a busy summer schedule. That release date shows how confident the studio is in its product, dropping a new title and sure it will bring in the crowds. But then it was quietly and unceremoniously pushed back to February for… counterprogramming. Yes, that’s what we’ll go with. Just so we’re clear, counterprogramming on Valentine’s Day always works out great for every movie. No, wait, I got that backwards. It’s always a financial disaster of epic proportions. The only movie to successfully win counterprogramming on Valentine’s Day was Deadpool and let’s be serious here, that was a violent rom-com. The only other movie to do well financially in February is Black Panther which came out on the 16th. President’s Day is good for February releases because it gives movies an extra day to gain some traction because outside of Marvel releases, February is where movies that aren’t romances go to die. Couple that with the fact that there hasn’t been a secondary advertising push for Alita and it’s pretty clear Fox is looking at a Jupiter Ascending level misfire with this $200 million clunker.
1) Shazam! (April 5)
I said above when I was talking about Joker that the DC film universe is a hot mess and nothing encapsulates that idea than this piece of trash. Shazam has always been one of the most ridiculous hero out there, so when I heard they were fast tracking a Shazam movie because The Rock signed up to be Black Adam, it sounded pretty idiotic to me. Not even a bad ass Black Adam could save a Shazam movie. Then they moved Johnson to his own solo film but decided to push forward with this nonsense. Tonally idiotic, the trailer for this showcases how it’s ripping Chronicle off in a humorous way except for the fact that none of it is funny. Which is important if you are, you know, trying to make a comedy. I can’t put into words how many things are wrong with this project, but at the very least WB has strategically positioned it’s release to fall between Captain Marvel and Endgame. It won’t help it, but at least WB are trying. Can we please just call it on making DC films and stop subjecting to this garbage every couple of months?