Drug Dealer Simulator 2 Review – Business Isn’t Booming

Drug Dealer Simulator 2 Review

All ye’ with dreams of slangin’ and bangin’ unite! Drug Dealer Simulator 2 is here to rock your world like a brick (of pure Columbian bam-bam) smashing through your window. At least, that’s what it’s fantasized about doing amidst a mescaline-induced fever dream. In reality, instead of making me feel like a drug mule turned drug kingpin, Drug Dealer Simulator 2 left me with dry mouth and a pounding headache. Oh, how I long to be Tony Montana, face down in a water fountain.

To its credit, Drug Dealer Simulator 2 offers a relatively nuanced approach to starting a criminal organization. From the start, you’ll be tasked with not only manufacturing illegal goodies such as delicious reefer and beautiful black-tar heroin but also delivering them. Grow-ops and production facilities are rather involved, requiring ingredients, equipment, and TLC to ensure a quality product. This is only half the battle, however. You’ll also need to manage an ever-expanding list of clients that must be kept happy.

Deliver the Goods

The problem is that maintaining customer satisfaction quickly devolves into an overwhelming time crunch. You’re constantly tasked with setting appointments at specific times, forcing you never to be far from a particular meetup location. In turn, this creates a gameplay loop akin to a frantic juggling act – so much so that I question if Drug Dealer Simulator 2 was ever intended to be a single-player game. You can team up with a friend throughout its lengthy campaign, but I wish it didn’t feel so mandatory.

I imagine most will find the campaign more enjoyable with company. If not for the more relaxed experience it offers, then surely for breaking up the monotony of its storyline. If you’ve ever played a game or seen a movie about criminal enterprises, you’ve seen everything Drug Dealer Simulator 2 offers. It’s a routine, run-of-the-mill tale covering a rags-to-riches cliche that leaves nothing to the imagination. The world is never bereft of activities, but the narrative is deprived of creativity.

The Good Life

There’s a ton of stuff to do as you climb through the underworld ranks of Drug Dealer Simulator 2. There wasn’t a single time I found myself without some sort of task to complete. However, the vast majority of it ends up being a repetitive slog. I never had the time to simply sit back and enjoy the fruits of my labor. Instead, Drug Dealer Simulator 2 bombarded me with a never-ending cycle of procuring supplies, developing and moving products, and weak combat. It’s like a GHB-laden Groundhog Day, but never in the fun Bill Murray kind of way.

Speaking of weak combat, Drug Dealer Simulator 2 severely struggles with mechanics. Generally speaking, it’s a nightmare to navigate. The action feels light and floaty, never offering the visceral thud I hope to find in a first-person experience. Menus are an absolute chore to work through. I lost track of how often I would select a menu option only to find nothing registered. They’re also so condensed with information and inventory that finding what you’re looking for is a pain.

Harsh Realities

Drug Dealer Simulator 2 is also decidedly ugly. There are spots peppered throughout its world that aren’t as offensive to the eyes, but generally, it looks dated. Character models are nothing more than Sears mannequins strewn about the streets. Lip-syncing and realistic animations are non-existent. And low-resolution textures are as prevalent as I’ve seen in a long time. It all makes for a rough-around-the-edges vibe that unironically feels like the worst parts of the last two decades.

I think that’s where Drug Dealer Simulator 2 fails the most. From start to finish, it feels like a wholly unpolished, underdeveloped game. There’s no denying that when compared to its predecessor, Drug Dealer Simulator 2 outshines it in almost every way. But that doesn’t mean it’s something I can necessarily recommend. If you loved the original, I’m sure you’ll enjoy the sequel. If you’ve never heard of the series and are interested in jumping in, keep your expectations in check. I see potential in Drug Dealer Simulator 2, but as of now, it’s a bust.

***PC code provided by the publisher for review***